The ultimate guide to quality sleep (and the *coziest* night routine)

Sleep is absolutely heavenly when you are blissfully unaware that you’re even sleeping. It is a gift, an opportunity to fully relax, reconnect and reset. However, it can be just the opposite when sleep is hard to come by, disrupted or you struggle with actually *getting* to sleep. I have struggled in the past but I worked out the coziest night routine that worked wonders for me, so I wanted to share the ultimate guide to quality sleep.

I have also added some vital information from a sleep scientist who has all the information to know WHAT the benefits of sleep actually are (it was more interesting than I thought it would be!)

Winding down and getting yourself ready for sleep could become one of your most favorite daily rituals. Let’s dive in!

***This post may contain affiliate links, but only to products I genuinely love. It won’t cost you anything extra. You can read the full disclosure here.***

Interesting facts about sleep

OK, the first thing that I learnt about with sleep is something that I think I knew, but didn’t know that I knew. Sleep is Overnight Therapy! When someone tells you that you should make a big decision in the morning, or don’t respond to a msg until after a nap etc. is because sleep actually works on our brain and emotions like therapy, or in some cases even better than therapy!

Everyone knows that lack of sleep has an effect on our emotions. The deep emotional center called the amygdala gets around 60% more reactive when someone has had less than 5 hours of sleep. 

Without much sleep there is also evidence that the prefrontal cortex that makes good logical decisions along with the amygdala there is a disconnect which makes our decisions emotional rather than a mix of emotional and logical.

Sleep reprocesses emotional memories almost like a soothing balm which takes the edge off those experiences. That’s why it’s not really time that heals all wounds, but time WHILE sleeping. Sleep is really like emotional first aid.

Sleep is critical for learning and memory. Sleep is important beforehand as it needs sleep as a foundation to lay down those memory traces. Then sleep is needed to cement those memories into the neural architecture of the brain to associate, assimilate and integrate all of the information together.

Without sleep the memory circuits of the brain become waterlogged and your brain can’t absorb new information effectively. Now I understand why sleep is so important before and after studying for a big exam. Having an all-nighter is not the most effective way to spend your time!

Sleep is also God’s gift to us. Rest is a gift. It’s also a need, but if we see it as a gift, which I believe it also is, then we will see sleep in a more positive light, which helps us prioritize it and give it the rightful place it needs in our daily life.

Psalm 4:8 “In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety.”

Proverbs 3:24 “When you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet.”

Also on that note, God loves to speak through Dreams. Dreams are one of the ways that we  process the day. Dreaming about difficult experiences is part of a healing process. Some dreams are purely our brains processing our emotions, beliefs and thoughts from the day (that’s why sometimes they are absolutely crazy!) Other times its a beautiful way for God to speak to us when He has our full attention. It’s a way that we can connect with Him without all the usual emotions and unnecessary thoughts.  

Lastly, sleep is the foundation of which the 2 important pillars; diet and exercise sit upon. Sleep and the immune system are highly intertwined and connected. During sleep your brain and body generate and recharge your immune system! Therefore good quality and quantity of sleep enables our body to increase its sensitivity to the command of the immune instructions. 

If you have 7 hours or less of sleep a night, studies have shown that you become 30% more likely to get the flu. However, if you are having 5 hours or less you become 70% more likely to get pneumonia. Sleep is more important than I ever realized. It is something we should prioritize as highly as diet and exercise for a holistic health approach. That’s exactly why I created the ultimate guide to quality sleep (because girl you deserve that *blissful* sleep).

Caffeine & Alcohol

A common question when it comes to sleep is caffeine and/or alcohol. Some people know they can’t drink caffeine after a certain time of the day otherwise it will make it harder for them to fall asleep, but what if falling asleep isn’t the issue, but the quality of your sleep.

Also alcohol often makes us feel tired so it seems to make it easier for us to fall asleep, but what if it also is affecting the quality of your sleep?

Alcohol before bed makes most of us feel sleepy and seems to help us relax, but what it’s really doing is actually starting the process of putting us in a sedated state. This actually robs us from our REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep. Heavy alcohol can also affect our breathing which results in waking up multiple times during the night, even if we don’t remember it at all!

Caffeine on the other hand usually gives us more energy and keeps us a little more alert so it seems to make more sense that this would keep us up more at night. But what you may not know is caffeine temporarily blocks brain signals from adenosine, a sleep chemical. This means that you may still fall asleep but your sleep will be in such a light state, meaning that you didn’t get the REM sleep you needed and you will still feel very tired the next day.

I suggest experimenting with Chicory coffee. It is a caffeine-free drink made from roasted, ground, and brewed chicory root. I find it delicious!

Or Mojo – a healthy energizing focus blend. (Contains caffeine).

Napping

I haven’t always known for sure whether naps during the day are good or bad. However, according to Matthew Walker, they are good! But they can also be bad. Let me explain. In October 2020 the US Army fitness dropped its revised fitness manual and it included a recommendation called ‘strategic napping’. In this manual they explained the benefits of naps as “to build physical lethality and mental toughness” but to ensure they are “short and infrequent” in order to “restore wakefulness and promote performance.”

Here are 3 keys to a healthy strategic nap:

1. Keep it short and sweet; you don’t need more than 20 minutes to boost your energy levels and mood.
2. Napping in the early afternoon is more effective than later in the afternoon, otherwise it can mess with your nighttime sleep.
3. Creating a comfortable and restful environment, quiet, dark and cool is best. 

Working Out

This one could be different for each person however cardio late at night could be the reason for your sluggish feeling in the morning. According to Matthew Walker, cardio should be done at least 3 hours before sleep as it keeps the body working and it is much harder for it to wind down- even if you feel exhausted after.

Night time routine – make it relaxing to wind down

This to me, is the fun part. I love having a nightly routine that I enjoy and feel relaxed and ready to enjoy the blissfulness that sleep brings. I have tried a few things over the years and these are definitely some of my favorite ways to wind down:

Start at least 2 hours before you go to bed. I understand sometimes this will be impossible if you are coming home late and want to go to sleep as soon as you get home. However, when you are home, its a good idea to start at least being aware of your wind down time 2 hours before.

I have created a list of my favorite rituals that have helped me wind down for the night, by no means do you need all of them to have a blissful sleep, but if you choose just 1 or 2 and mix and matched this list just may be the inspiration you need to create your own sleep ritual!

Kindle

A Way to do this is to limit screen time. I would recommend not being on screens at all in that time, but if you must try to at least limit it. Blue, bright light makes our brains alert and it can take longer for our brains to wind down.

Reading for me has always helped me relax and wind down. However since I need a light to see the words it can also keep me up. I heard about Kindle and how the background of the device does not shine blue light, instead it has a faint light that enables you to read the words clearly and looks like you’re reading pages of an actual book more than a screen.

I have the $10 a month kindle subscription which is like a library card for kindle. You can read as many books as you like a month as long as they are part of the kindle unlimited subscription (most are, it’s just insane how many are available) and they all get downloaded to your device so you can read them when you don’t have internet. Great for camping!

Buy some pajamas you love!

Pajamas to me have always felt like a bit of a waste of money. Until I was given a beautiful set, after that I realized that wearing pajamas that make me feel cozy, beautiful and relaxed is a worthy investment. I invest in normal clothing, so why not the clothes you wear to bed? It was amazing how wearing a lovely set of pajamas instead of an old t-shirt helps me feel rejuvenated and signals to my brain that I am ready to wind down and get some R&R. (Check out my favourite set here).

Hot beverage to slow you down

There are many hot beverages to choose from that promote a healthy night’s sleep. I love changing it up between different types of teas, like Honey Lavender stress relief Tea, or Peppermint Tea and occasionally a Hot Chocolate but what I have found works the best for me and is loaded with nourishing goodness is a beverage called Replenish.

Replenish is a powerful brew consisting of seven mushrooms, ashwagandha, and fulvic acid, which work together synergistically to help support body function, promote restful sleep and stress management and even improves skin health! In all honesty it is on the pricier side, however finding what works for you to aid a blissful, deep sleep is such a worthy investment to your holistic health.

Create a Sleep Sanctuary

Aldrin and I have moved around a few times and I have felt like our bedroom was not a priority for us as a cosy haven. We would always ensure the living area and kitchen were set up beautifully but since we didn’t spend as much time in the bedroom it was left as a last thought. However, I had been inspired to create a sleep sanctuary, a place where we felt comfortable and relaxed, so we decided to invest in a couple of things to make it feel that way. The first thing we did was to buy new bedding (it’s the absolute BEST). 

White noise

Currently we live in an apartment, so it’s common for us to hear other people’s conversations, dogs barking, and even car noises, so we have always used a self standing fan to give us white noise. I swear this makes such a huge difference. Our dogs sleep in our room and they like to bark at noises so it has also eliminated that and of course the fan is not blowing on us but it also circulates the air. 

CBD

CBD can be a touchy subject, especially if people have had negative experiences with it. However, if used in the recommended way it has shown amazing results for better sleep and a muscle relaxer. The ONLY CBD that I recommend is Suthe, a water soluble, full-spectrum whole-flower Hemp CBD fluid that preserves the full profile of the cannabis plant for faster, more effective results. All plants, no additives, optimal absorption which supports body function. In my opinion this is the best CBD out there and the only one that I would use.

Magnesium

Magnesium is something that we can all be deficient in, and it can affect how quickly and deeply we sleep. I have found that the nights I take magnesium before bed I sleep so much faster and deeper than the nights I don’t. I recommend this powder that you just mix in some water, and it is tasty too, I love taking it just before I jump into bed. I highly recommend it!

Thankfulness Journal & Prayer

Some days can be harder to wind down than others, especially if we have a lot on our mind. For me I have found focussing on the things I am thankful for makes a huge difference. If I am stressed or worried before trying to sleep it takes longer with all those thoughts swirling around in my head! So about half an hour before I go to bed I like to write down a few things I am thankful for from my day and to spend some time with God processing all the things that happened. Being thankful is the best way to end the day as it gets your thoughts resting on the positive and gives me the opportunity to put my trust in God and not the enemy.

I love what Pastor Bill Johnson says about thankfulness:

“Thankfulness is the number 1 virtue that changes the nature of a person’s life.”

“Thankfulness takes what the enemy meant for evil and places it into the hands of the Father who causes all things to work for His glory and our benefit.”

“Don’t worry about anything; instead pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank Him for all He has done.” – Philippians 4:6.

Room Temperature

This one is HUGE for me. I cannot sleep if I am too hot. Most nights I have to poke my feet out of the blankets and I never ever can wear winter pajamas, I would boil. But everyone is different, so knowing what works for you will enable you to fall asleep much easier. I find that wearing summer pj’s all year round, adjusting how many blankets I use and keeping a moderate to cool room temperature is vital to a good night’s sleep! 

What to do when you can’t sleep

The ultimate guide to quality sleep wouldn’t be complete without mentioning what to do when you can’t sleep. When I am struggling to sleep it’s usually one of 3 things, I either am feeling stressed or have a lot on my mind, the temperature in the room is not working for me or my brain didn’t have a chance to wind down properly before hitting the pillow. Whichever one of these it is, it’s important to not to panic.

I suggest spending time with God and thanking him that he knows everything you need to do the next day and how much energy you need to do it well. Trust Him, give it to Him and then either read (on a kindle with the dark background option only) or try something from above that you haven’t tried yet! Trust me they contribute to not only sleeping through the night, but also the getting to sleep part.

OK there you have it! The ultimate guide to quality sleep! I hope you enjoyed it and if you have anything else that helps you sleep better or enhances your night routine I’d love you to share in the comments.

If you enjoyed this post, you might also like:

– ‘My exact Guide to a Slow Morning Routine‘

– ‘How you can Change your Life by Journaling Daily‘

– ‘The Biggest Mistake you *might* be making with Self-Care and How to do it Better‘